When covering ALLDAY PROJECT’s godawful pre-releases last week, I compared them to scratch cards. Both songs turned out to be “not a winner, try again” scratches, but now we’ve finally arrived at their album’s proper title track. Crash doesn’t need to do much to clear its train wreck predecessors and it passes that extremely low bar.
This isn’t something to brag about, and Crash is clearly no One More Time or even Famous, but it’s not actively annoying my ears either. The song has its moments, most of which feel as if they’re about to blossom into some exciting dancefloor centerpiece. Instead, Crash plays things coy until the end. We never get the big beat drop it seems to tease, as the production constantly pulls back. On one hand, this sense of build keeps listeners’ attention, but it also lasts way too long. By the time we reach Crash‘s finale, the limp payoff doesn’t feel worth the effort put in.
Simply put, the song needs a “bang” somewhere. This doesn’t have to come at its end, but it should come somewhere. Otherwise, I’m not sure what Crash is doing. Its hooks aren’t strong enough to captivate on their own. Its lyrical content is the same shallow crap the group peddles on all their tracks. The performances are fine but listless. So, by the time Crash finishes, I’m left with the question: “what are we doing here?” It’s not a particularly satisfying feeling.
| Hooks | 8 |
| Production | 7 |
| Longevity | 8 |
| Bias | 7 |
| RATING | 7.5 |
Grade: C
The first paragraph 💀
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I prolly would have been more entertained biting my toenails than listening to this song. I’m so bored now, I can’t even be arsed enough to write a sarcastic comment with a shitton of kaomojis 💔 could have been a fun Black Eyed Peas-esque banger tbh…
Tarzzan’s stupid ass white hair extensions out of 10 for me 🩷 (7.25 (7, 7, 8, 7))
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Very YG-coded (duh). I liked it a lot on the first listen, but it grew off me after a few more listens.
Finally there’s no sudden tempo change in the second verse, and I particularly like that section a lot. It does what a second verse should do by building up the hype and keeping the momentum going.
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Just from the the intro, the song already promised us a lackluster listening experience. Its definitely not a good start and its no surprises that the tune basically goes nowhere near interesting. They used an energetic upbeat rhythm for the track baseline, but how could the song final product became so muted and downbeat instead. And there are no B-sides gem worthy of replay in the album too. Its just another disappointing project from Black Label. I guess having chaebol in the group did not make them immune to the label mismanagement.
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the production really needed to amp things up and this would’ve been an easy mid 8, a shame
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Before diving into how I feel about this song, I want to address something close to my heart. I am honestly getting quite tired of seeing unwarranted negativity and harsh commentary online, especially regarding Tarzzan. I’m not calling anyone out specifically, but the targeted vitriol toward individuals online for no reason is so heavy-hearted to witness. People often try to critique artists by claiming they are imitating hip-hop or R&B culture, but by that logic, a huge portion of the entire K-pop industry would face the same scrutiny, as K-pop has drawn heavily from Black musical roots since its very inception.
It is deeply frustrating to see such targeted hostility. Please, friends, let’s choose to spread love and peace instead. I understand that you won’t love every single release or song, but going as far as saying someone is the reason a group is failing or worse, wishing severe harm upon them (and yes, I have genuinely seen comments go that far)is heartbreaking. Words carry so much weight, and they can inflict real pain if used carelessly.
I care deeply about every single person reading this, even if we’ve never met. That doesn’t matter to me, because every human life has inherent worth. It truly never hurts to be kind, and as someone who strives to live for the One who first showed me unconditional love, I want to encourage us all to build one another up. Let’s make the world a little brighter with our words! Simply giving you some food for thought 🙂
Turning back to the music itself, however, the song unfortunately feels quite flat and doesn’t do anything particularly interesting. The beat stays mostly static throughout, and while the chorus had some genuine potential, the production ends up sounding a bit too clunky to let it soar.
7
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I gave up on the kpop boards many years ago, pre-covid. Keyboard warriors who should get real hobbies. Scandal headlines make me think oh what are they all going on about now.
To paraphrase SNL “That’s the rule. That’s the goal now. What are we doing? What’s going on?”
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